In lockdown I went mountain with my family. We climbed up the mountain. I was so tired when I was tired I stopped half way and drank water. Then I continued all the way to the top. When I got to the top I pulled some food and ate. A dog came by and it put its tongue out so then I gave food to the dog.The dog owner came and took the dog. When I finished eating, I went down the mountain to the park.When I finished playing in the park I went back home. The end.
Ka pai Tino. Is your story exactly 100 words? Did you find it challenging? I wonder if you could swap some of you 'whens' so that your sentences start with some different words?
ReplyDeleteKia Ora Tino!
ReplyDeleteWell done for sharing your story! You were very lucky to go for these amazing walks! I wish I still had a car so I could go on mountain walks too!
I like how your described every action chronologically (in order regarding the time), it makes it very easy to understand your story!
Maybe you could think about using more vocabulary so that you don't repeat some words too often? What other nouns and adjectives could you use to describe a dog? a dog owner?
Miss Mathilde